Wake Game on ESPNU

Hope everyone has a Happy Turkey Day. Go Dores.

Bowl Projections / Homecoming Part Deux

Now that we lost to crappy UT. Our bowl picture has become very clear. The SEC has tie ins to 9 bowl games and the pecking order is rather convoluted. For complete details, click right cheer. I will only go over details pertaining to the Dores as Florida (BCS), Alabama (BCS) and Georgia (Capital One) are already locks for those bowl games. Below is an analysis of each possible game with a percent probability of Vanderbilts attendance.

Cotton Bowl, Dallas, Jan. 2: Ole Miss' win over LSU puts them on th inside track to beat a depressed Texas Tech team here. Dore Probability: 0%

Outback Bowl, Tampa, Jan. 1: With the loss, the Dores wiped out all but the slimmest of chances of playing here. With a win over Climpson USC will most likely end up here against some nobody Big 10 team. Dore Probability: 2%

Chick-Fil-A Bowl, Atlanta, Dec. 31: Barring a miracle, the Dores will not be partying in Atlanta on New Years. I believe the biggest draw for the former Peach bowl is now the LSU tigers. Still an outside shot for us if we beat Wake. Dore Probability: 13%

Music City Bowl, Nashville, Dec. 31: A strong possibilty, and it got even stronger after out loss to the hated construction workers out east. This would be an opportunity for alumni to head back to Nashville and have a blow out New Years eve. Its too bad homecoming was just a month ago. Because Kentucky has been here the last two years, I expect the bowl to take the home town team. Dore Probability: 50%

Liberty Bowl, Memphis, Jan. 2: This is last weeks analysis, but it still holds true...If the Dores lose out, or lose to UcheaT, this becomes a strong possibility. This bowl would love to have Vandy and expect the Gold Strike in Tunica to be full on Jan. 1 for a party. Expect to take on Tulsa or Houston out of CUSA. Look to see UK playing on Beale. Probability: 30%


Independence Bowl, Shreveport, Dec. 28: Repeat analysis as well...If disaster strikes and we blow our last two and become the last pick in the bowl line up expect the Dores to be riverboat gambling in Shreveport. We would take on a lower Big 12 team like Nebraska and most likely lose because Adams is back at QB. Don't expect this to happen, but it is an outside possibility. Don't expect an SEC team here unless Auburn surprises Bama. Probability: 5%


Let the discussion continue, feel free to publish your hopes/opinions/praise for my analysis in the comments. See you Bowl Season!

Tang

Jonathan Crompton was ranked the 60th best player in his class by Rivals and the 2nd best pro-style quarterback.

Those rankings are great and all, but I bet the main reason he scored so much tang at the local mall was because of the sweet peach fuzz mustache he rocked back in the day.

"They Some Snitches"

Old clip, but I think this Bama fan puts it pretty accurately...

Five Functions to Dore Domination

Before we get to this weeks functions, lets see how the Dores did last week…
1’ Start Chris Nickson at QB – Check
2’ Apply Pressure to Randall Cobb – Check
3’ Especial Teams – Umm No
4’ Bring Sexy Back- Check
5’ The Wishbone - Eh, No

3 of 5 Derivatives predicted a 31-13 VU victory. Not bad, final was 31-24.

1’ Play Like the Favorite – We are, and Bobby needs to explain that. Vegas has the Dores -3 heading into the game against UcheaT. This is only the THIRD (82,84) time in history that we have been favored and we need not be intimidated.

2’ Shut Down the Run – Tennessaw hasn’t done much against anyone this year, but I expect them to come out and try to run the ball against us. If our front seven can hold up, I think our secondary will hold their own.

3’ Fade Pattern to DJ – Run it every play. We will average a TD 70% of the time. He is the best athlete on the field when he is and we should exploit this in his last best Ewww T game.

4’ Bring Especial Teams Back – Against Kentuc-eye, we did not do this. Out special teams were awful, fortunately the cats was worse. Hey punt returner, catch the effing ball and run it towards the opposing teams end zone.

5’ Kick them in the Nuts – Wait for it… Now, right in the pecker.

The following predictions are based on our ability to reach all five derivatives.

0 = EwwT 17 – VU 0
1 = EwwT 18 – VU 10
2 = VU 31 – Eww T 14
3 = VU 28 –Eww T 9
4 = VU 38 – Eww T 7
5 = VU 56 – Eww T 0

Movin on up

I know we have the UcheaT game this weekend, but journalists are already talking about players going pro.  Obviously DJ Moore's name has been coming up because he's the ( . ) ( . )'s.

What're your thoughts?

I obviously hope he comes back next year, but can understand why wouldn't.

Reasons for him to stay:

- We could/should be better next year as we return everyone but Reshard and Nickson.  Obviously losing Nickson hurts more than it should b/c it puts us in the position of possibly starting Adams, hacomeon Larry...a discussion for another time.

- If he's not a guaranteed first round pick.

Probably not a lot of positives to outweigh the money and potential for being injured, but there are probably others I can't think of...

WORK SUCKS

This whole job thing is really getting in the way of whoyawith bloggers. It is a pain and we are sorry for the lack of posts this week. But here is a primer of what to expect over the next few days...

Friday: Five Functions

Sunday: Updated Bowl Picture

As for today... You get your first chance to see the basketball team take on Illinois in a huge early season game at Memorial Gym. Tip is at 7pm and the game is on Fox Sports South. I hope you can make it. I heard we signed this guy named Jeff Taylor who is a baller!

In other news, prepare for our First Major National Championship. Mother truckers.

Bowl Projections

Now that we have it wrapped up, where will The Dores go bowling. Granted there are lots of outcomes still left, but the picture is getting pretty clear. The SEC has tie ins to 9 bowl games and the pecking order is rather convoluted. For complete details, click right cheer. I will only go over details pertaining to the Dores as Florida (BCS), Alabama (BCS) and Georgia (Capital One) are already locks for those bowl games. Below is an analysis of each possible game with a percent probability of Vanderbilts attendance.

Cotton Bowl, Dallas, Jan. 2: A Big Bowl game against a superior Big 12 team if we were to get the invite. The Cotton traditionally takes the best available SEC West Team, which will most likely be the winner of the Ole Miss v. LSU game. Vandy will get in if we win out and USC wins out and the Outback selects the Cocks over the Dores. Expect LSU here. Probability: 5%

Outback Bowl, Tampa, Jan. 1: New Years day bowl game against a Big 10 team. This is where I expect the Dores to end up if we win out. Also a possibility if we beat UcheaT and lose in a tight one to Wake. This bowl has first priority of the best remaining SEC East team, which will be us or USC. USC has a larger base and is closer, but I think a 8-4(5-3) Vandy team is a sexier pick than a 8-4(4-4) USC team. Expect USC here. Probability: 25%

Chick-Fil-A Bowl, Atlanta, Dec. 31: A Great Bowl game against an ACC opponent. This is currently where I have the Dores playing if we win at least one more game. Vandy has a strong alumni base in Atlanta and the Chick-Fil-A Bowl gets pick after the Cotton and Outback. A victory over Tennessee locks us in this game or better or a win over Wake most likely sends us here. We will be up against, LSU, Ole Miss, or USC for this game. Go ahead and make a hotel reservation in Atlanta, we will be going up against some popular New Years parties, but a Dore appearance is likely. Probability: 40%

Music City Bowl, Nashville, Dec. 31: A strong possibilty, but the word on the street is that David Williams has already met with the people from this bowl and has expressed interest in having an out of town bowl game for the students. It will be hard to get them to come back a week before classes start, but there will be a strong alumni showing. I would expect Vandy in the Liberty over this game. We will be competing against UK, USC and Ole Miss for this spot most likely. Expect to see the Rebels in Nashville. Probability: 10%

Liberty Bowl, Memphis, Jan. 2: If the Dores lose out, or lose to UcheaT, this becomes a strong possibility. This bowl would love to have Vandy and expect the Gold Strike in Tunica to be full on Jan. 1 for a party. Expect to take on Tulsa or Houston out of CUSA. Look to see UK playing on Beale. Probability: 15%

Independence Bowl, Shreveport, Dec. 28: If disaster strikes and we blow our last two and become the last pick in the bowl line up expect the Dores to be riverboat gambling in Shreveport. We would take on a lower Big 12 team like Nebraska and most likely lose because Adams is back at QB. Don't expect this to happen, but it is an outside possibility. Don't expect an SEC team here unless Auburn surprises Bama. Probability: 5%

Let the discussion begin, feel free to publish your hopes/opinions/praise for my analysis in the comments. See you Bowl Season!

What Do the Dores and Tricky Dick have in Common?

WE'RE GOING BOWLING!!!!!

Rescuecom

This guy needs a serious wedgie.

I wouldn't need him to figure out what's wrong with our team. Obviously our passing game sucks, but more importantly, we don't have any deep threat.

You can get away with having a terrible offense as long as you take shots down the field and keep the defense honest. Granted I haven't been able to watch every game, but in the ones I have seen, we don't try to push the field at all.

I remember Nickson making some throws in the beginning of the year, I'd like to see him try some more...

Five Functions to Vandy’s Vivacious Victory

1’ Start Chris Nickson at QB – I can’t stress this enough. If we want to win this game, Nickson has to be running the point. Dishing the ball to A.J. and driving to the hole. Seriously, with his dual threat capability, and Kentucky’s suspect D, starting Nickson is the MOST important aspect to this game. Kentucky is #2 in the SEC in sacks (let you know who #1 in a second) and the best way to neutralize this is to let Nickson run around. Let him loose… If he is not on the field, it could be a loooong night.

2’ Apply Pressure to Randall Cobb – How do you stop the bleeding? Apply Pressure. Vanderbilt is #1 in the SEC in sacks… WHAMMY. The best way to take a freshman quarterback out of his game is to hit him early and often. The pressure will also allow our premier secondary to mix up coverages and make some big plays.

3’ Especial Teams – Don’t know if you noticed, but we lost the special teams battle to Flo Rida (In the Ayer A A Ayer). This has been our lamb and tuna fish all year. In order to get to where we want to be over New Years is by a big play OR no mistakes on especial teams.

4’ Bring Sexy Back – A little trickeration will be nice. Jamie Graham is questionable, so some reverses to DJ Moore or Sean Walker, maybe a QB throwback to STARTING QUARTERBACK CHRIS NICKSON. Some CB blitzes with Myron Lewis or a safety blitz and let Hamilton eat some Cobb.

5’ The Wishbone. Why the eff Not?

Predictions based on our ability to reach all five derivatives, also if any readers know how to find the 5th derivative… Get a life.

0 = UK 31 – VU 7
1 = VU 24 – UK 17
2 = VU 24 – UK 10
3 = VU 32 – UK 13
4 = VU 31 – UK 9
5 = VU 176 – UK -18

The Mystical Number 6

Well, here we sit. 9 games into the season, and the Commodores are 5-4. Honestly, at the beginning of the season, if you had told me we would be 5-4 at this point, I would have been excited. However, the way the season took form, I can't help but be a little disappointed at our current situation. Losses to UGA and Florida aside, I really wish we had been able to finish against Mississippi State and Duke. Moving on, we have three chances to pick up the mystical number 6. Here's my thoughts:

@ Kentucky: Kentucky has a great defense, and puts good pressure on opposing QBs. They are 2nd in the conference in sacks (To Vanderbilt), and they looked damn good against Ga last weekend. Their freshman quarterback is a rising star, but their offense is streaky. The line is at UK-4, as of this morning, and I think we have a pretty good shot at taking the game. Nickson needs to start this game. I don't want to see that goofy Oklahoman walking out to start it off.

Odds of win: 50%

Tennessee: Obviously, this is a down year for UcheaT. All I have to say is Wyoming 13 - UT 7. As unusual as it sounds, I think this is the best chance we have for a win the rest of the season. They are down on the ground, their head coach is a lame duck, and the game is in Nashville. All that being said, this IS the Vandy - UT game, and while its not exactly GA vs. Fla, it is a rivalry game. This is a MUST win in my mind. Not only for this season, but for recruits and for the growth of a fanbase.

Odds of a win: 75%

@ Wake Forest: Wake has tripped up a couple times this year, but is still a very strong football team. They are still in the mix of things in the ACC, and this is beginning to become somewhat of a rivalry game. While their defense has been questionable at times, Wake has won by putting points on the board. Add all of this to the fact that they will be fighting for a second tier bowl, and I say this is a tough road game. Luckily for us, they play in the ACC.

Odds of a win: 50%

I am still keeping my New Year's plans wide open, as I have been waiting 25 years to go to the postseason. Here's what a friend said about it, and I liked it:

Dome: "If we miss 6 wins, I'll explode like the Wad when someone walks in on him in the middle of practicing shady, miscellaneous hobbies."

Wednesday Weedings

Get ur news... Some a day old, some hot off the presses...

Really, Does Adams have to be hurt to lose his job...HE SUCKS

Battle for the Toilet Bowl

Eww T game on underwater vision

Under Pressure...da da da dadada dum

Smart + Football = Goodness

If you are a minority, come to Vandy... Get PhD!

We still can't believe CBJ is seriously contmeplating starting Adams. Tanya Harding is on the first non-stop flight to Nashville as we speak.

In other news... After receiving an unmarked package with Vanderbilt Sweatshirt Farve Jr. announces his intention to attend Vanderbilt University. Then gets in his Maserati and drives away...

The 'Young' Gunslinger

Clearly he cannot be the "Ole Gunslinger," as his glorious uncle already holds the title, but this guy appears to be special.

As withleather has pointed out, Brett Favre's nephew is a "star" quarterback for St. Stanislaus in Bay St. Louis, MS. He's just set some touchdown records and appears to have that extra special competitiveness his uncle has defined during his NFL playing career.

I wonder if this kid loves playing football more than all of the other high schoolers in MS. I'm guessing that's the main reason he's set these records...he just loves playing the game and has fun.

I'm sorry to pick on the kid, but I had to spread the word before Peter King jumps on his bandwagon and starts saying that the "Gunslinger" will live on.

Oh and he looks like he could use some sharpie to fill in the space between his eyebrows.

Spreadsheets and dreams

All statistics are taken directly from the link provided.

I'm still trying to figure out the best way to transfer images from Excel to the blog...hope this is readable.

*If you click on the image it's a lot easier to read...

Help me help you

The Jesus' favorite sports writer has us going to the Music City Bowl and playing Va Tech. I'm surprised he's picked us to go to the post season as he writes for SI.com and every journalist from that site hates on every team I'm a fan of...Peter King's still the worst, but not as much as he was before he saw the light and voted for Art Monk.

Judging from our previous four performances I wouldn't be surprised if CBJ and the other Dores' coaches spent their November and December convincing high schoolers that we were close to becoming legit instead of coaching. However, I think the Music City Bowl would be ( . ) ( . )'s.

What're thoughts on other bowls? The only ones I've seen mentioned with the Dores are the Liberty Bowl and the Sun Bowl.

The Good News

Let the stupidity stop. We are a top 20 academic institution, yet our football coaches cannot see what is right before their eyes. Adams is a BAD quarterback. Move him to wide receiver let Nickson take all the snaps and start warming up Larry Smith if he ever gets hurt.

Adams is averaging under 14 points a game as a starter and we are 0-4 in games he started. Nickson is 5-0 as a starter and the team averages over 22 points ber gamr. Yes, Adams was efficient in coming off the bench against a woweful Auburn team, but the only reason people thinks he is better than Nickson is because Nickson was hurt. Now he is healthy, and a 1,000,000,000,000 times better QB than Adams will ever be.

Please coaching staff, do what has been obvious for a while and play Nickson at QB, win out and lets go bowling.

Tim Tebow = Quailman

The Jesus knows Chuck Norris and he has always had a bone to chew with the special needs fans of the University of Florida. How dare they use his jokes in reference to Tim Tebow? Chuck Norris would roundhouse kick him to the face before Tebow broke the huddle. By special request of Sir Norris, WYW has redone and made more appropriate jokes for Tim “Quailman” Tebow.

Btw, how fucking lame is the use of “Superman” as anybody’s nickname, what did your three year old come up with that one?

Tim Tebow wears Care Bear pajamas and sleeps in a My Little Pony tent.
Tim Tebow drinks tall-non-fat-no-whip-soy caramel macchiatos.
Tim Tebow pees the bed.
Tim Tebow has erectile dysfunction.
Tim Tebow lost the Heisman Trophy.
When you Google Tim Tebow, he is the 4th picture that shows up.
Tim Tebow can’t grow facial hair.
Tim Tebow wears jean shorts.
Tim Tebow once had the chance to fuck two chicks at the same time…and didn’t.
Tim Tebow lost to Ole Miss…at home.
Tim Tebow’s favorite meal is a tofurkey sandwich with a small side salad, no dressing and a green chai tea.
Tim Tebow didn’t vote.
Tim Tebow is the cause of the subprime mortgage meltdown, because he didn’t pay.
Tim Tebow wears jean shorts.
On Christmas morning Tim Tebow cried when he got a Cabbage Patch doll instead of Rainbow Brite.
Tim Tebow went to Amsterdam and didn’t do drugs.

Please post your own Quailman Tebow jokes in the comments...

Tidbits....

This weeks article by Rick Reilly focused on JayCut and his dealings with Diabetes . I personally think that Cutler should grow a bushy moustache (which I thought was a byproduct of Diabetes)...

Change Vandy can Believe In

America is a new place today and the policies of President-elect Barack Obama are already benefiting the Vanderbilt Commodores. As we begin to redistribute the wealth in this country, one of the first areas to see the benefit will be the Southeastern Conference. In a recent radio interview PE Obama stated, “The speed and parity in the SEC is still unbalanced, the way we will correct this is by taxing those teams with strong recruiting classes and redistributing their four and five stars to less fortunate teams.”
This means no longer will Alabama, Florida, Georgia and LSU be able to hoard all those good players! Five stars here we come. Socialism kicks ass!
Unfortunately, under the tyrannical Bush administration the redistribution has yet to occur so we will not be seeing Percy Harvin in a Dore uniform this Saturday. But, I don’t have to pay my mortgage anymore!!! Maybe I will take the cash and put it all on Florida to cover this year, at least until we have the the new and improved Dores next year… Julio Jones at WR!!
For now we still have Thorpe Award semifinalist DJ Moore!

Also, the results are in and 53% of readers belive the Dores will be bowling this year. That is a LANDSLIDE take that Mr. 52% Obama.

Gator fans wear jean shorts

+
=

This is about the only bad thing you can say about FL right now. After witnessing the asswhooping they laid to UGA last weekend, I'm hard pressed to find any holes in this team- they are solid in all 3 areas.  To have any chance, VU is gonna have to break out its secret weapon, the power of hot DP in the stands...

ESPN2 in HD

For those of you who are not on top of your game, the Florida match will be televised on the numero dos. This markes the Dores 4th appearance on the family of networks and do you know our record on the family so far? 3-0 thats right.

As the boys over at sports line point out, lets hope this is a trap game.

Get your game notes right cheer.

Fulmer Out

ESPN.com is reporting that Phil Fulmer will not return as the head coach in Knoxville next year. More to follow...

Double Secret Probation....

So, the Football team was off this weekend (thank God), but how many of you knew that on Saturday the Men's Basketball team traveled to Chapel Hill for a top secret scrimmage with the National Title Hopefuls? Thanks to Mallory for bringing this to my attention.

To come later, I am looking for Florida to have a major letdown this weekend. Go Dores.